i've moved.
for the 4th night, i'll be sleeping in my new pink room.

to my surprise, i'm not missing the East yet.

i guess busy-ness is curbing the misses.
moving the boxes, unpacking the boxes, rearranging the stuff, finding space for the stuff.... i've broke my nails; i've gotten plenty of bruises.

i've been isolated for the past week- the mere thought of the long walk out to the main road is keeping me at home, albeit the convenience of going to town is tempting me out.
the only time i step out of my lane is during des' supper time.

des: thanks for abusing your poor knee to help us out!

a great experience holidaying in India

>>>A GREAT EXPERIENCE HOLIDAYING IN INDIA

i'm back to civilisation(the one im used to).

no no no, India ain't smelly;
no, the hotels were not disgusting or smelly;
neither was Air India.
and no, i wasn't in full anticipation to come back home.

a week in india is truly an eye-opener.

i've grown more sympathetic;
how not to when they're beggars everywhere.

i've grown to hate food wastage, even more;
how not to when many Indians there starve daily.

i've grown to be more satisfied with little things;
how not to when i see hungry & dirty beggars smiling & waving at me happily.

i've grown to love my home;
how not to when the poor there live in slumps.

i've grown to appreciate my clean country;
how not to when litter & pee fills India.

i've grown to hate racism, even more;
how not to after all the time spent there.
how not to after all the heart-tuggings scenes.
how not to after the encounters with nice Indians.

*

the Taj Mahal is an awesome sight.


a great experience holidaying in India.

india, here we come!

>>>INDIA, HERE WE COME!

after months of anticipation, we're finally off to india (delhi, japur & agra) tonight.. for a week.

i love the East

>>>I LOVE THE EAST

as i boxed up my stuff this morning, i was overwhelmed with a great sense of sadness.

i was another step closer to move out of the East.
ive lived in the East side of Singapore all my 19 years, and suddenly, to move to Novena is a horrendous idea (to me).

ill most definitely miss cycling to East Coast Park- the cycling trips; riding from my place to the beach.
ill miss walking out to savour the great food here- the laksa, the rojak, the chicken rice, the porridge, the durian puff, the bak kut teh, the plentiful Peranakan restaurants.
ill miss walking Parkway Parade.
ill miss the ability to cycle with ease to Tanjong Rhu.
ill miss the daily rituals in the Indian temple and the singspiration from the Baptist church.
ill miss the convenience of taking buses from here- direct buses to almost anywhere.
ill miss my friends telling me they're lucky i live near them everytime they send me home.
ill miss, believe it or not, the long travelling distance to school.
for some weird reason, ill miss the daily travelling on the ECP.
i love the East.

yes, its not like i can't travel to the East.. and i should be glad for a nicer housing environment- a private pool, my relatives as my neighbours, being able to see my favourite car (the oh-so-so-awesome Ferrari 360 spider) everyday; a better location- central- much closer to town & school, and ive Newton Circus so near me.

granted, ive Macritchie reservoir in substitute(barely) for East Coast Park; Newton Circus can substitute(barely) the great food at East Coast Rd, Siglap and Laguana.

...but but but the East is just different. it's just inexplicable. honestly, i rather remain here. i simply love the East.

as Ms Kua said, "the easterners (of Singapore) are very proud of the East. i can't imagine moving out of the East- it's something only people who have stayed in the East will understand."

i totally agree with that.
totally totally totally.
totally totally totally.

sad; im so so sad to leave. this is the first time i'm not in anticipation for a new house.

suddenly it all seems like a blur

>>>SUDDENLY IT ALL SEEMS LIKE A BLUR


i've never felt this lonely; even though i've company amidst the streams of human traffic.
i've never felt this sense of inferiority; even though i was just there alone.
i've never felt this sense of urgency; even though there is nothing i want to grab hold of quick.
i've never felt this fear of losing something; even though i do not even own it to begin with.

*

it is the fear that i may lose it all,
with regrets overwhelm;
then, things would never be again.

*

it used to be so apparent; and so i thought.
suddenly it all seems like a blur.

moments of contemplations

>>>MOMENTS OF CONTEMPLATIONS


consumer behaviour- checked. mass media research- checked. e-commerce- checked.
3 papers down, 2 to go; legal system contracts and organisational management.

i'm in the midst of my exams and im feeling every bit as though i'm on my vacation.

the past week had been tedious, albeit fruitless- travelling to & fro school to try to study, falling asleep really early (the moment i read the notes) & waking up in the middle of the night in attempt to read the notes again.

i finally used the Internet today, after a solid one week of abstention- an amazing feat!

*

many a times, in retrospection, we fall in the state of psychedelic. we ponder: perhaps that something shdn't have gone this way; how would things have turned out if it had went that way instead; how would my life be now if that haven't happen; was i too rash? did i make the wrong move?; is there anything i can do about it now?

why. if only. it should have been. it shouldn't have been. how. what can i do now.

almost all of us secretly wish everything would turn out just the way we want.
and the way we want may not even be possible (anymore). this, despite, being surrounded by many other options and all of them are, hmm..not too bad or better.
put it this way, almost all of us are seldom satisfied with what we have, & we are always on the continual search.

i'm so guilty of this.

i prefer to call what has been flashing in my mind as memory recall, but as i totally hate to admit, it might also be called regrets (as naz puts it).

*

Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right

*

Don't know what to say
I never meant to feel this way

*

like a clown, I put on a show.

*

'nuff said for now.
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